Nerdlife

In 5 easy steps:

1. Find hammer
2. Give up on finding hammer…grab pliers
3. Attack drive with pliers, destorying circuitry but leaving platters untouched
4. Cut finger, swear and bleed profusely on drive
5. Repeat steps 3 & 4 until you realize that nobody cares enough about your data to read it directly from platters. Toss drive in trash, go grab a band-aid

Tada!